Managing issues with suppliers at your wedding
The red flags and advice in here is priceless. Sadly supplier issues can be common when planning weddings – and they can really affect how you feel about your wedding, your budget but most importantly your actual wedding day.
First up, we want to say that the vast majority of suppliers are fabulous, incredible at what they do and an absolute joy to work with. They really do care about your wedding and your happiness during the planning process. However, supplier issues do happen relatively often, so the most important thing you can do to avoid any of this is to vet your suppliers very carefully. Really put the time and effort in to getting the right team through research, building connections and getting recommendations and hopefully you won’t face any of these.
The way the Italian wedding market works is on commission model, which means that confusion over money is often central to the supplier issues we hear of. Money is already stressful enough, let alone when you are dealing with your wedding budget, foreign currency and a financial model you may not be familiar with. No one wants to spend more than they have to or feel taken advantage of. The main avoidance tactic here is clear contracts with all suppliers…but sadly that doesn’t always bypass these scenarios.
The Problem: You’ve booked a photographer only to have them say that they now want to add expenses on.
The Solution: If you have a contract with the supplier and they knew at the point of signing the size of your wedding, the dates and location and the scope of work and the cost was agreed, this cost should not change. If the photographer later realises the prices are high for expenses, in our opinion is their issue. They should have quoted correctly at the point of signing. In this case we suggest gently pushing back on the request, highlighting that you’ve signed an agreement when they were fully aware of the scope, location, size etc of the wedding and any changes should be swallowed their side. If you have asked them to come for longer or travel differently, that’s another scenario.
The Exception: Covid did throw issues up around quoting for suppliers, but we would argue that we’re now well past that and suppliers should be wise enough to have the right expenses clauses in place to suit their businesses.
The icky feeling: Couples can find this hard to do because they are worried about upsetting the supplier by pushing back. Of course you wish to be kind and not unsettle things but this should not be because you are afraid that they will act differently towards you or your wedding. They are under a contract to deliver their best work and should do this no matter what, or they are in breach of contract.
Photo: Wild Heart Photo & Film
The Problem: When a supplier cancels the contract 9 months from the wedding due to personal reasons.
The Solution: Check your contract! Hopefully there will be clauses in the contract which state that they must offer a replacement supplier matching their abilities. Or give you the opportunity to opt out of this and terminate the contract by mutual agreement.
If your supplier cancels the contract close to the wedding it could really leave you in the lurch with limited options. A good way round this is to ensure that these 2 clauses are in every contract you sign:
a. That the cancellation by the supplier within 6 months of the wedding means you get a full refund of any deposit.
b. Within 6 months from the wedding they can’t cancel unless extenuating circumstances and if they do they need to provide a replacement supplier of the same value and calibre. Should this alternative supplier be more expensive, your booked supplier should pay the additional fees.
Photo: Benjamin Wheeler
When a venue changes the location or details of the wedding which will significantly change the feel or layout of your wedding.
Another recent example experienced was when a venue proposed to change how a venue looked significantly which would change a couples plans and aesthetic for their wedding day. This wasn’t just a small thing, this was something that changed the way their wedding day would look and feel and would not result in the wedding that they thought they’d booked at the venue.
In Italian culture there is often a very strong line drawn with most discussions – it is very hard to shift opinions and actions. With this in mind, we would suggest always go into negotiations or discussions with very clear points, strip out all emotion and base your 'argument' on fact. In this case, the planner (Wiskow & White) wrote a letter detailing the factual impact very specifically and argued that it was a breach of contract - the couple would not be getting what they had originally booked. Other couples at the same venue became involved to give it more weight. It worked!
Sadly this is the most common issue. And one of the main reasons why La Lista was founded...we had seen enough couples struggling with wedding parameters being changed and them left feeling helpless. Firstly, it is absolutely the venues responsibility to make all terms, rules, costs etc clear when the couple are booking a venue. Anything other than this way of working is disorganised, deceitful and unprofessional.
When you book a venue you sign a contract and hope that everything is transparent. You have to trust that your venue has specified all criteria in the contract which they are asking you to sign. Quite often, other rules or restrictions can crop up through planning which can have a great impact on the wedding you’re planning (financially or logistically)
Example A:
At the last minute (the day before the wedding) a venue gave a couple via their planner, an ultimatum, book a suite at the hotel or the venue would cause problems at the wedding. This is not only extremely unprofessional and greedy, but clearly entrapment and pushing the boundaries of legality. Sadly in this case, the planner stumped up the fee for the suite to avoid worrying the couple! And vowed to never work at that venue again!
Example B:
An unexperienced venue, after being booked by a couple, decided they wanted to control all suppliers that were booked for the wedding. The couple had to go through the venue to book everything. This is so that the venue could take a commission on every single thing booked. This was a La Lista wedding and in fact the bride explained that they felt trapped and forced to go along with everything the venue said for fear of causing issues. More details are included on a live session in The Club (our membership platform).
A venue has no grounds to set these rules, unless it is written in your contract.
Example C:
A supplier (a pizza truck) arrived at a wedding to serve the post party, but was prevented access onto the venue grounds unless a commission fee of 500 euro was paid by the planner. Details of the pizza truck's arrival was included in the briefing from the planner before the wedding, but yet they still pushed for additional money! Again, this is entrapment and utterly unprofessional! And sadly, in so many cases the demands are met as couples are fearful of their wedding being ruined if they don't comply.
Photo: Lato Photography
A classic problem couples experience, but in this case it is often warranted! Suppliers are busy and they have boundaries, lives and will always focus on the wedding in hand. So if you are trying to reach a supplier about your wedding in 2024 and it is the summer of 2023, then likely the weddings happening that season will take priority. Planners tend to reply to enquires once a week in one go. So it could take 5 days to hear from them; that’s slower than it used to be and ideally it would be less. A lot of suppliers aside from photographers can take a week or more to reply.
Firstly, if you’re not getting a reply from someone you’ve enquired with, move on. They’ve got your email and they’re choosing not to reply. Do you want to work with someone like this? If it’s someone you’re working with that you aren’t getting a reply from – check whether it’s actually urgent / important and whether they’d see it as this. If it really is, chase it up. If it isn’t, trust them to get back to you when it needs attention. You are undoubtedly important to them and the speed of their reply doesn’t determine your status in their work world. It becomes an issue when it really is urgent, couples are worried that timelines aren't being met and as a result they are missing out booking suppliers who are getting full.
First piece of advice – understand how your planner works, their process and timings before committing to them. Ask for their communication parameters and of course get reviews before booking. Please! If you find yourself in the situation where your planner isn’t delivering to the timeline and you don’t trust that to be ok – eg. They said they’d get you catering recommendations in April and they have now changed it to October. You know that other couples are booking catering in April and you’re worried it will mean you have bad options, higher prices or no catering! What do you do?
Like any relationship – clear communication is key. Ask your planner for a quick call to
raise your concerns and understand their point of view. A planner should
always be available for a quick call to discuss any major concerns you have.
You should be coming from a place of trust and acknowledge their
expertise but raise your legitimate concerns. Once heard, if you still
strongly believe you need action now i.e. the catering needs to be booked
soon, find a way to get this done.
We’ve seen scenarios where the couple have then taken on finding their own catering because the planner won’t do it until October. This isn’t OK –
you’ve paid for this service to be done for you.
As you can see it’s a fine balance between understanding the importance
and urgency, trusting your planner and ensuring your wedding is going to
plan. Ultimately a good contract, a good understanding of the process and
timings BEFORE booking (so you can hold them to it) and developing a
good relationship with good communication is key.
Boy, that was a lot of information and unfortunately a fair bit of negative press for suppliers and venues. We must reiterate, we adore the suppliers and venues we list on our site so head over and check them out.
If you’ in a wedding bind and no idea how to progress in a difficult situation, then hit up amazing wedding planner, Lucy White and book a Wedding Surgery. A private session dedicated to you and your wedding woes, allowing you to troubleshoot and get to a solution.
